"The only news you can trust"
Volume 12 Issue 1
100% pure malice
"I was kissed by an MP"
"I must have been at least six months old at the time and this old fellow, who I didn't know, just picked me up in front of a crowd of people and kissed me. My mum thought it ever such an honour, I didn't I can tell you, that's why I hit the bottle and have been hitting the bottle ever since.
The shocking revelations of a feminist survivor
It turns out that the man who kissed me and ruined my life is a multi-millionaire Tory MP and I intend to sue him."
No more touchy... no more feeley.
For too long MP's and men in general have got away with touching babies, children and women without their permission. It's got to stop. It's all part of the mysoginistyic, patriarchy that aims to oppress women, minorities, homosexuals and those of other ethnic origins.
"Blimey, I only kissed a baby"
ANOTHER BOOT EXCLUSIVE:
EXTRACTS FROM THE BOOK
NO ONE IS TALKING ABOUT
It's the sort of thing the Nazis used to do because basically all men are Nazis and want to invade women's personal spaces and have all the best bits of everything for themselves.